As an executive coach and clinical psychologist of over 17 years, I have worked with thousands of high performers helping them uncover hidden issues that get in the way of reaching their full potential. What I’ve found is that high performers are simply exhausted emotionally, physically, and mentally. I believe that everyone has a purpose but so many are so much so on autopilot that they miss out. As a CEO and a perpetual high performer, I learned that I need to lead by example. I ask my clients to do hard things, so I do hard things. I advise my clients to have a coach and a therapist, so I have a coach and a therapist. I want underrepresented minorities across the world to know that balance is possible and that self-care should be a way of life. Having it all is possible. But it’s nearly impossible to achieve this alone. I help executives eliminate stress, anxiety, and burnout so that they can have the time and energy to live their best-balanced lives.
Work-life balance is both a mystery and a necessity, so much so that some say that it doesn’t exist. I beg to differ. As a business owner, wife, and mother, balance is a must and I had no choice but to figure it out. Like many other high performers, I actually enjoy my career. I look forward to complex problem solving and the fast-paced life of a CEO. I also love to watch football with my family, cook on Sundays, and cuddle with my kids whose legs are almost longer than mine. The primary method I’ve used to achieve balance is to delegate.
Often, women automatically assume multiple roles out of habit and tradition. We tend to pile tasks on without taking anything off. Balance can certainly be achieved but executive women should remember, “just because you CAN do a lot of things doesn’t mean that you should”. One tip for women is to ask themselves, what is the cost of this? I challenge all women to participate in high-value activities, which will be different for every individual. For example, a high-value activity for me is sitting around with my family with no errands or tasks for anyone. That doesn’t happen often, so when there’s an opportunity to “relax”, I do everything I can to make it happen. Other high-value activities might include taking on a stretch assignment, developing a brand, scheduling quality conversations with a C-suite executive, taking a quarterly vacation, having brunch with friends, exercising, or even meditation.
“I help companies and organizations eliminate stress, anxiety and burnout, and create skillful, cohesive and effective teams. My philosophy is that the whole is only as good as the sum of its parts.”
Dr. RJ Verwayne integrates education of the brain and body connection and explains neuroscience in a relatable manner. Dr. RJ brings a balance of science, practicality, wit, humor and relatedness. Whether it’s speaking at a conference for busy professionals, hosting a corporate retreat, or attending a transforming ERG groups around the world service event, Dr. RJ Verwayne is passionate about wellness and self-care.
Dr. RJ is the “go-to” professional for any and all topics pertaining to mental health. She has appeared as the expert psychologist on the Lifetime series Killer Kids, Oxygen Network series Snapped: Behind Bars, and on several episodes of the docu-crime series For My Man on TV One. She was the host of Wellness Wednesday for KPRS Hot 103 Jamz in Kansas City, and has authored several blogs and articles for a variety of publications.